“Norwegian is pretty much just drunk English.”

[[Disclaimer]] So I’m bad at choosing titles for my blog entries, so this is how it’s going to happen: Europeans say amusing things from time to time. I’m going to quote someone every week, and this will be the title of my blog post for that week.

In other news: HOLY CRAP I’M IN NORWAY!

In the past (almost) week, I have discovered the following about this country: It is always dark, everything is expensive, the men have an impeccable sense of style, and the parties put America to shame.

I have learned so much already since I've arrived. I learned that if you are flustered enough at an IKEA and don’t speak Norwegian you can very easily end up with duvet covers instead of sheets. I learned that it is possible to live somewhere where it rains constantly. I learned that you can meet 400 million people in one day and somehow still feel a personal connection with all of them. I learned that having a broken shower is the worst thing in the world, and warm water is the best thing in the world. In the past 6 days, I have heard more accents and been called “American” more than I ever imagined possible. I played English charades with people who only know English as a second language….and we were still on the same playing field. I spent a lot of time wishing that I knew a second language. I have walked all the time, everywhere. I learned I have no shoes that are good for walking. I also learned I have no shoes that are good for walking in rain. On a completely unrelated note, I should have brought more socks.

So what have I noticed about Norway and Europe in general? It’s the Twilight Zone. Everything is eerily similar, but slightly off. The showers have separate knobs for water pressure and temperature, like a sink. The light switches are higher up on the wall and smaller. Everyone recycles infinitely better than people in the states. There isn’t really such thing as “excuse me--” People will reach across you at grocery stores and bump you in the street without a word. There are small differences everywhere—things that make you double take. Things that have felt weird to me include Norwegian’s obsession with being EVERYWHERE on time (even parties! Which, by the way, in true viking fashion, parties generally start around 6pm. But hey, they’re punctual vikings. So there's that) and, strangely enough, the keyboards. Finding the question mark is really annoying.

All in all, my time in Kristiansand has been GREAT. I have met so many great people, and I can already tell that these connections are going to make me feel like I have a second home across the globe. Despite everything that has gone wrong (and a lot has gone wrong), I discovered that every unfortunate event makes for a great story, and every mistake, a lesson…. But mostly a good story ;)

Translation: I have no shame, so this blog should be amusing. Stay tuned!